


Changing, But Is It Okay?

by GasterFan5



Series: Steven Universe Fanfictions [2]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: More Characters I Forgot, Probs Stuff I missed gonna get you pissed, sorry - Freeform, what do I say
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-13
Updated: 2018-10-08
Packaged: 2019-07-12 00:34:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15983819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GasterFan5/pseuds/GasterFan5
Summary: Rose had finally decided she wanted to have a child!!! Of course, Pearl isn't very happy about it...one night she confronts Rose about it and takes the child for her. How are the other gems going to react, and how's life gonna be without her?





	1. Confronting And Doing

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Pearl's Sacrifice](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/417419) by Morte Mistrata. 



> Hey! I'm back! And this isn't finished...yayyyyyy

“Pearl?” Rose asked, excited to tell her the news. “What is it, Rose?” Pearl asked, turning to face her. They were in the kitchen, and Pearl was cleaning the kitchen. Rose was in her own room, and came out. Rose had sat on one of the stools, whereas Pearl was standing up and had halted her cleaning temporarily.

“I’m going to have a baby!” She said with joy. Pearl wasn’t happy about this, as she knew that Rose would die to form this kid, but…she figured if Rose was happy that’s all that mattered.

“I just wish…I could be there for my kid…” Rose said, sighing. She smiled again, a sad smile. “But at least the baby will have you guys,” Rose exclaimed cheerfully.  “I know you will support them at least.” Rose said, looking at Pearl and smiling even bigger than before.

. . .

Pearl thought about what Rose said for the months that Rose carried the small infant. _‘Maybe she’d let me..? There is a way…and I’m sure she’d want to do it…see her child at least once in her life.’_ Pearl thought while straightening the couch cushions, oblivious to the outside world. She continued thinking in this manner, unsure of what to do.

“Pearl?” Garnet asked, concerned that her friend was examining the couch for the past hour. “Huh? Oh, what is it Garnet?” Pearl asked, getting herself out of her thoughts.

“Aah, it’s nothing. Just wondering why you’ve been straightening the couch for an hour,” Garnet said, expecting some sort of a response. “Oh, right. It was bothering me,” Pearl stated afterwards, frowning slightly and straightening it a little bit more. Garnet shrugged, and left to buy doughnuts. Pearl sighed, staring at the couch.

_‘What would Rose think…? She’d probably love seeing her own child and raising them,’_ Pearl thought, sadly smiling as she looked over at the portrait of Rose. It was made by Vidalia a while back, but it was one of her best pieces. Pearl walked over to the front door, and headed over to the beach, staring at the sea and the sun high in the sky. She sat down on the sand, her arms folded around her knees and her feet on the sand, not really caring at the moment about the mess. Pearl stared into the waves crashing along the shore, and started thinking about what she could do for Rose. She sat out there for the remainder of the day, considering heading back in when she saw the sun setting. _‘I’m going to do it, at least suggest it…but will she accept the offer? And when should I bring it up…?’_

“Pearl?” Rose asked with a soft voice, walking over towards where her friend was sitting. Pearl looked up, jumping slightly as she hadn’t expected that, and figured now was a good time. “What is it, Rose?” Pearl asked in response lightly, not knowing what she would bring up.

“I wanted to talk about the child. I know that you all will raise the baby well, it’s just..I want to say my goodbyes, because we don’t know what’s going to happen.” Rose started, sitting next to her, her legs on the sand and her arms holding her up while she stared at the ocean as well. Pearl thought now was definitely a good time, considering the topic had already been brought up. Rose sighed, looking directly at Pearl, the two of them meeting in a gaze. Before Rose could say anything more, however, Pearl spoke in some sort of tense voice, like she was unsure of Rose’s reaction.

“I’ve been thinking for a while now…I know how much you wanted to see your child, and..I was wondering if maybe you wanted to?” Pearl started, still looking directly at Rose, shifting slightly to look at her better. Rose was confused, as she hadn’t thought this was possible. “Well, I do…” Rose said cautiously, unsure of what the cost was.

“There is a way…if I carry the child for you,” Pearl finished, suddenly regretting sitting in the sand as it was starting to get all over her. She looked at Rose, waiting for her reaction. “I could never do such a thing…” Rose stated while shaking her head.

“It’s not like I know about this child much, and I think the child would really like being with you while it grows up,” Pearl said, looking down at the sand. She wasn’t really good with these conversations. Rose knew there wasn’t really a way to decline this, considering Pearl wasn’t going to give up on it. She knew Pearl all too well, and knew that she wouldn’t give up on this for a long time, and she’d probably end up doing it anyways. “I’d…like to see my child, yes…” Rose said firmly, agreeing with Pearl. “I’m only agreeing because you won’t let me disagree though,” Rose said directly after that, making Pearl laugh a little. The two of them sat in silence for a minute, watching the waves slowly crash along the sand and bring different shells each tide.

“Alright then. In order to do this, we need to fuse,” Pearl started, breaking the silence and standing up and shaking some sand off of herself. Rose nodded, and got up as well. The two of them danced, laughing a little during it, and fused into what they always called Rainbow Quarts. It wasn’t really Rainbow Quarts to Pearl, considering she was a diamond, but her new form had made her into a Quarts so it counted. Pearl thought, “Now we need to, uh, transfer the child..” their minds connected and so Rose could easily understand, and they did, as sharing the same mind made it easy to do. Rose simply transferred the child to the other mind, and then it was done. The two of them unfused, and it’d worked; Pearl was carrying the infant now, and Rose wasn’t. It felt strange to both of them. Pearl had the child, and felt weird with the new child; Rose had gotten used to the child, and now it was gone. That felt even stranger. There was no turning back now that they did it.

“I haven’t figured out about the gem yet, but I’m assuming something…I’ll get back to you on that..” Pearl said, assuming that Rose wouldn’t want a pearl child. While she truly did like Pearl, she didn’t want her child to be some sort of slave; Pearl was a rare exception, however whatever was wrong with her-she would never tell-she knew it wouldn’t transfer over to the kid and told Rose so. Rose nodded, agreeing with this. The two of them went back inside and didn’t say a word to the other gems.


	2. Figuring Things Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pearl has taken the child, and discovers a way to give the child the Rose Quartz gem...but how?

Rose opened the door, stepping inside with Pearl coming in behind her and shutting the door. Garnet was cooking something, showing Amethyst how to do it. Amethyst looked unamused by it, but still helped nonetheless. The house was already finished for when the child would show up, as it could be any day. “We’re making dinner,” Garnet said, smiling and looking up as the two of them entered. “Smells good,” Rose said, sitting on one of the stools. Amethyst leapt over the counter and sat down on the left of Rose, and Garnet put the food on plates and put the food in front of them, taking a seat to Rose’s right with her own plate. Pearl sat at the last stool, next to Amethyst. Well, there was an empty seat…Pearl was on the other edge, a seat between Amethyst and Pearl empty. Bismuth had been unable to handle Rose leaving, and had been bubbled. She didn’t want to stay…They were hoping some day to bring Rose back, and decided to bring her back then as well. The four of them chatted throughout dinner about the current missions, as well as what would happen when she left; Garnet would be the sort of leader without Rose there, keeping control and maintaining stability of the team, Amethyst and Pearl would be following Garnet, and the three of them would take care of the child with Greg. The child would live with Greg for a while, and then move to the Crystal Gems if some powers moved in-as Greg wouldn’t know what to do and it would be easier for experienced gems to take care of one. One by one, Rose Amethyst and Garnet finished their food, not really minding that Pearl didn’t eat; she never did eat normally, it always disgusted her.

“I have to go tend to the moss; it’s around blooming time and it’s best to bring it up now,” Rose said, getting up and using the warp pad to go to the moss. Garnet nodded and moved over to sit on the couch, Amethyst hopping up and sitting next to her. The two of them chatted happily about what they were going to do the next day, while Pearl still sat at the stool and thought. _‘Maybe if we take out a chip of her gem, then it could grow to form its own gem…And then the child’d have the diamond gem,’_ she thought, smiling slightly at the fact she figured it out.

…

“What’s got you so happy, Pearl?” Amethyst asked, smiling as well. “Not sure…Guess I’m just glad I’m here,” Pearl said, looking at Amethyst with a larger smile then before. Garnet smiled uneasily, as she could usually see many outcomes; in this case not all of them were good. “What’s got you so happy, Amethyst?” Garnet asked cheerfully, smile on her face when she looked at her. She shrugged. “Guess I just like people being happy,” she said. Pearl sat in silence for a few minutes, and went to her room awkwardly; the tensions could easily be seen as she went into her room and left with an awkward smile. Garnet frowned slightly, and shrugged it off, as it wasn’t really her business. The two of them went to where they set up the TV, sitting on the couch up there, and the two of them played _Cookie Cat Adventure I,_ not having played it before but they had seen the cookie cats in the store before. Rose came back, and had ended up going to Greg’s house to talk with him for one of the last times... A while later they saw her come back and enter her own room, which she didn’t do often besides going to rest.

.  .  .

Garnet continued playing the _Cookie Cat Adventure I_ until Amethyst ended up falling asleep, and she turned off the TV. She got up off of the couch, and laid Amethyst down. Garnet went down the stairs and picked up a blanket, dragging it back up and putting it on Amethyst before going to her room for some time to think. _‘I can’t just become the leader when Rose leaves…’_ she thought, sitting down on the ground in what would one day be the bubble room next to the lava pit. _‘…But it’s obvious enough that neither Pearl nor Amethyst will step up to be the leader, so I have no choice…’_ Garnet felt nervous, as any day Rose could have the child and..and she’d be the new leader. Garnet was still sitting, and at some point managed to fall asleep after a while of thinking.

…

Pearl was in her room for a while, tiredly thinking of other ways and resulting in the one specific solution to the gem. She sighed, as there really was only one other way: Let the child have her gem. But that wasn’t happening, and so she waited in her room until dawn to head out. Pearl stood and walked out of her room, sitting on one of the stools.

_‘Guess I’ll just stay here until she shows up,’_ Pearl thought, deciding to make something for the team to eat when they woke up. She went over to the stove, opening the cabinets and pulling out a frying pan. Pearl grabbed some eggs and cracked them onto the pan, lighting the stove fire and watching them slowly cook. It was something easy, and it sure would pass the time for Pearl. At some point Amethyst woke, but she ended up falling asleep again after checking the time. Pearl never minded being alone, it was easier then having to talk to other people sometimes, and it allowed her more time to think about things going on.

She finished with the eggs, carefully sliding them onto a plate and wrapping the plate with tinfoil-to keep it warm for a while-and started some bacon. _‘They’ll find out what’s going on eventually, the pink against my white gem will make it obvious..’_ she thought, sighing and staring at the food. She never actually minded eating, but her weaker digestive system never allowed her to. If she ever ate, she ended up throwing it up later in the day, and she never told anyone else about that…so she just never did eat, and she thought after a while it was gross in general. Pearl finally finished the bacon, unwrapping the plates and putting it on as well, and didn’t have anything to do to pass the time. She decided on sitting and waiting, which gave her horrible anxieties because she kept thinking about everything that could happen and what the gems would think. Rose came in after a while, which felt like days, and sat down on one of the stools. “I already had breakfast at Greg’s, but you could eat something..you know, for the kid?” Rose said, her eyes having stars in them at the very end, as she was very excited for the child to arrive. Pearl nodded, attempting to stomach some of the food to make Rose happy. She already felt like puking, but she didn’t and looked over to Rose, who was sitting on the stool beside her. “I figured out what do to, but we need to go somewhere else..” Pearl whispered, looking at the plate with only a bite or two gone. Rose nodded.

…

“Finish the plate and then we’ll go,” she said firmly, to which Pearl sighed and ate. She knew that after this she’d be in the her room all day, but if it made Rose happy… Pearl finished, and went to the main warp pad and stood there with Rose, traveling to Rose’s Fountain. “So..why are we here exactly?” Rose asked when they arrived, admiring her work. The vines were all neatly surrounding the fountain, with pink flowers blooming on each vine. The thorns were still there, but not as big as before. Rose always knew how to take care of them, just like she knew how to take care of people. They stepped off the warp and walked the path to the fountain, the vines aligning the walls.

“Well, t-there’s only one way to get the other gem…and it’s gonna require healing,” she said in response to Rose’s question, sitting on the fountain edge. Pearl was feeling worse then before, daring to vomit into the fountain but resisting the urge. Rose nodded and sat beside her, ready for whatever it may be. She saw Pearl take out a chisel from her gem, to which she shuddered. _‘What could Pearl have used it for in the past?’_ She got out of her thoughts, hearing Pearl say something along the lines of, “I need to take a portion of your gem,” to which Rose nodded and waited, shutting her eyes. Pearl looked at Rose, and carefully took out a fragment. She looked at the fountain and used it to heal Rose, nodding. “I got it,” she mumbled, staring at the chisel. Now it was her turn, which would be even worse.

Rose opened her eyes, thankful it was over, and watched Pearl put the chisel to her head and take out a fragment, accidentally going a little too far but she didn’t seem to mind. Pearl used the fountain to heal the crack, now a pink sliver in her gem visible. “There, now it may take a little while longer for the child to appear due to the gem being underdeveloped. It’ll be around two weeks,” Pearl said firmly, looking at Rose for a reaction. Rose was very excited for the child to show, but was also upset. She’d never see Pearl again, and the two of them were so close. The two of them sat at the fountain in silence for a few minutes before Rose got up.


	3. Struggles And Surviving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pearl manages to carry the child, but that doesn't mean it all comes easy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so tired....hello! Still thinking about the programming, as well as some sort of alternate version of the "Leaving For The Better". So yeah, but hey this might like....never be finished...it hopefully will be. ^^'

 

“We should head back now, the other gems’ll be looking for us,” she said, Pearl nodding and getting up, following Rose to the warp pad and going back to the main warp in the house. Both Garnet and Amethyst were eating the food set out, each on a stool,-Garnet on the edge and Amethyst next to her on the left-and smiled when they saw Rose and Pearl were back. Rose smiled as well, sitting on the stool next to Amethyst and noticing the empty seat next to her. She frowned, glancing back to Pearl who sheepishly came over, sitting beside Rose. She put a plate in front of Pearl, staring at her with a look meaning _you gotta eat that_ and Pearl sighed, staring at it. She decided on eating once the other two left, and had a nice conversation about the weather. Garnet had gotten up at some point to go talk a walk along the beach, to which Amethyst hopped up and followed. The two smiled, Garnet laughing and they walked out. It seemed they were enjoying the last few weeks with everyone there. Rose then looked at Pearl.

“Now you’re going to eat that,” Rose stated firmly, watching Pearl do her best to stomach it. Pearl finished the plate, feeling it start to come back up already. She mumbled something inaudible, and got up. Pearl folded an arm around her stomach and placed her other hand over her mouth, speed-walking over to her room and going in. Rose was concerned, going over to the door before it closed and sliding in, noting Pearl was already at the top and moving behind a large rock. Rose leapt up to the top like she must have, walking around the rock to see Pearl on the ground of the waterfall curled into a ball, her back to Rose. “Pearl…?” Rose asked softly, reaching out to her friend. Pearl jumped, falling off the waterfall and landing on the one under it and she tried to breathe. She fell on her back and stared, trying to calm down.

“Y-y..yes?” Pearl asked, looking up at Rose, who had leapt off and stood next to Pearl, worry and concern written in her eyes. “Is something bothering you…?”

“I-I’m fi-” Pearl started, clutching her stomach and turning to stare at the waterfall below them. Rose assumed it was something with the child, until she saw Pearl throw up what she ate over the edge. Rose frowned, and Pearl looked back up to Rose. “I..I’m fine…” she said again, hoping Rose would let her be. There was no getting out of this one now, though. Rose shook her head, staring with deep concern at her friend. Pearl’s stomach hurt badly, and she whined, curling into a tight ball and trembling. Rose felt bad for her friend, not understanding why she was like this. She patted her friend on the back, who was still whimpering now and again, and picked her up. She dragged her to the couch they had, putting a blanket on her. Rose sat on one of the stools, watching the blanket shake and her friend shut her eyes as hard as she could. They sat in silence for a minute, then Pearl opened her eyes and looked at Rose.

“Sorry for making you worry, Rose,” she said, looking down at the wooden floor. Rose tilted her head slightly, a concerned smile on her face. “It’s fine…Do you know why that happened?” Rose asked, making Pearl look up again. She nodded, still in slight pain but feeling a little better. “I have a very weak digestive system..It’s why I don’t eat much, or at all, and at some point I just didn’t like eating in general…” she started, staring at Rose continually. Rose nodded in understanding, guilt creeping up on her for making Pearl eat something. “If I eat say, a plate of food, I’ll get stomach pains and end up throwing it back up. It’s not like I need to eat anyways,” Pearl finished, a frown on her face.

“I should’ve told you sooner or did something…I’m sorry I worried you..” Pearl said, looking upset. “Hey, it’s fine. You need to rest, wait it out..I shouldn’t have made you eat that much anyways,” Rose said, smiling. Pearl nodded, sitting up on the couch. Rose pushed her back down, laughing. “You need to sleep,” she said, putting a pillow under her head and the blanket back over her. Pearl sighed, closing her eyes and managing to fall asleep fairly quickly. Her gem glowed, projecting her dreams.

_‘She must be feeling better then, if she can easily project her dreams now,’_ Rose thought, watching Pearl’s dreams with amusement. In this specific dream, Pearl was in the waterfall room alone listening to some sort of classical music, and she was dancing with grace. Rose watched the dancing for a while, it occasionally turning to something like Greg or Amethyst doing something stupid, like one time where Amethyst was attempting to eat a living doughnut friend of Greg’s, or when Greg attempted to clean someone’s van and Amethyst scared him. During these Rose noticed Pearl would have a frown on her face, clearly annoyed, and then during the dancing she would look peaceful. Eventually it became dark outside and Rose started cooking something for dinner. Amethyst and Garnet had spent the day at the arcade, probably discussing about Rose’s soon to be baby and her absence. Rose heated the pan, taking out ingredients for spaghetti and started to boil water, already making the sauce. Pearl was still asleep, snoring a little, and Rose enjoyed the silence for a minute. Pretty soon it would be this quiet, or would be very loud because of the mourning of the lost teammate.

She sighed. _‘Just two more weeks until the child shows up…and I’ll never see Pearl again….’_ Rose looked at her friend with a frown, and continued with the sauce, starting the noodles. After a while of silence she finished the food, putting it on plates for Garnet and Amethyst, as well as herself. She looked over at Pearl, who had woken up when she set the table, and watched her sit down in her usual spot with a sigh. She noted the food wasn’t for her, and felt relief about it, sitting and waiting for the others to show up. “I’m gonna go get Amethyst and Garnet,” Rose said, smiling as she walked out the door. Pearl nodded, and put her feet on the stool, her hands on her lap while she looked outside. Pearl jumped when she heard Rose yelling their names, and walked over to the door, looking through it. Rose was in the sand at the beach, waving and jumping for the two of them to get back over. Pearl looked over to see Amethyst and Garnet, who were both grinning and running over to Rose for their dinner. She saw the three of them turn towards the door, and she quickly hid behind it and shuffled over to her seat again.

“What’s for dinner?” She heard Garnet ask, who was already at the door. Garnet walked over to her stool and sat down, Amethyst sliding in her seat as well. The three of them were seated, Rose shutting the door and walking over to her stool and taking a seat. “It’s spaghetti,” Rose said, sliding the plates down the counter. Garnet nodded, and Amethyst stared at it hungrily before stuffing it in her mouth, much to Pearl’s dismay. She didn’t dare to look at Amethyst, it was too gross, but Garnet was eating at least a little bit better… Rose was eating maturely as well, but still not formal or anything. Pearl just smiled, adding commentary to the conversation every now and again while the three of them enjoyed their meal. They all finished, and Pearl hopped up and cleaned the dishes, not wanting to rest more than she had to. Rose stared for a minute, ensuring Pearl wouldn’t fall, and then sat down on the couch with Amethyst and Garnet. The three of them chatted together, Pearl walking into her room and sitting on the edge of a waterfall. The next few weeks were gonna be long…


	4. Revealing And Explaining

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hellooo! Don't expect a new chapter for a while bc I'm lazy -_-.... ok well enjoyyyy don't kill me

…It’d been a week by now, and Garnet noticed some pink in Pearl’s gem. She didn’t normally care about what Pearl did, but when it came to some sort of forced fusion-at least, that’s what she thought it was-it was her business. Garnet had waited all day for a chance to ask her about it, and then after dinner Pearl went to her room again. Taking a deep breath, Garnet opened the door of Pearl’s room and looked around for her, noting she was on the top waterfall and sitting on the edge like normal. She moved towards her, taking a seat on the water. Pearl looked over, clearly confused on what she was doing there.

“I’ve been meaning to ask you…” Garnet started, looking straight at Pearl. Pearl seemed to prepare herself for the question mentally, taking a heavy breath. “Yes…?”

“Well, what’s that pink fragment in your gem?” she asked, staring at it. At first the sliver was so small she couldn’t see it, but she noticed it one day and it seemed to get bigger and bigger as time passed. Pearl sighed, shaking her head. “I guess we had to tell you at some point,” she said, looking up at Garnet with a sad smile.

“What do you mean?” Garnet asked, confused. Pearl stared for a second, as if trying to figure out how to say it. “Well, you see…A while back, I asked Rose if she wanted me to…carry her child for her…” Pearl started, looking at her hands. It slowly started to hit Garnet, what it was, why Pearl was acting strange…it all made sense! “And then she agreed…and in order for her child to have the d- Rose’s gem, I needed to take a sliver of it…” she explained, kicking her feet delicately over the edge and not touching the water. Garnet nodded.

“How long?”

“It’s going to be a week.”

Garnet nodded again, trying to contain herself. She breathed heavily, trying not to cry. She didn’t succeed, the tears rolling down her face and being contained in her visor. Garnet sighed, looking at her friend for what could’ve been the last time. She knew that while it was hard on her, it was going to be even harder to tell Amethyst. Geez, how would she react? Amethyst really liked Pearl (like a family) and wasn’t as mature as Garnet was…She sighed again.

“How are we going to tell Amethyst?” Garnet asked, making Pearl look up at her. “I’m…not sure, I guess it’s better now then later because she’ll have more time to prepare…” Pearl sighed. “It’s still gonna be hard no matter what.” Garnet nodded, and stood up.

“Best to just tell her now then,” she said, walking towards the door. Pearl jumped, shocked they were just gonna go and do it, getting up and walking with her out the door. The two of them entered the house, Rose looking over with a concerned look on her face. Garnet nodded towards the sliver of pink in Pearl’s gem, and Rose realized that Garnet now knew. Rose nodded in understanding, looking down. Garnet looked over to Amethyst, who was napping on the couch. She walked over to her, her feet on the wooden floor making creaking sounds as she made her way there. She tapped Amethyst on the cheek softly, hoping she’d wake. Amethyst did end up waking up, groggily looking at Garnet and then Pearl, who was sitting on a stool, and then Rose, who was sitting next to Pearl in the usually empty spot. The two of them were talking about heck knows what, and she looked back at Garnet. “We have something to say to you,” she said, looking at Amethyst with a sad smile. Amethyst felt slightly afraid, what did they need to say…?

“…Alright, spill it,” she said, sitting upright on the couch. Garnet took a deep breath, and said, “You know how Rose is going to disappear?” Amethyst nodded slowly, waiting to hear the rest. “Well, now Pearl’s going to disappear instead of Rose…” Garnet finished, waiting for a reaction. Amethyst’s eyes widened in surprise and she looked over to Pearl for an answer, who looked down at the floor. She felt tears brim her eyes, falling onto the couch, and she asked, “How..how long?” Pearl looked up, a sad smile on her face. “It’ll be around a week…” Amethyst felt relieved that there was still a little time left, but very upset that she would be gone at the end of it.


	5. A Gain, and A Loss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know i know: I can't make long chapters to save my life  
> another short one!!!! yay? whatever. did ya miss me? Yea well I'm gonna disappear for a while because this stuff is time-consuming

. . .

Rose woke up the next day, glad to just…be alive. It had been another few days, and the clock was ticking. Any day now, Pearl would cease to exist. The four of them had all talked last night about what would happen, who would take what role in the new, modified group, and they basically said goodbyes. The first day Amethyst and Garnet found out, they went to their rooms to sit and really think. Garnet unfused at some point, overcome with grief-which was bound to happen no matter who ended up dying-and they came back together. Amethyst had talked less, done less, and Rose…well, she was just trying to enjoy the last moments with Pearl. Rose felt the clouds in her room shift, and she jumped off of her bed. “I’d like to go back out of this room,” she ordered, watching the door open. Smiling, she walked out and observed the house.

It had been a few days since telling them, and both Garnet and Amethyst were sitting on stools talking. Pearl was cooking something for breakfast, listening to their conversations and adding from time to time. Rose sat down in her usual spot between Garnet and Amethyst, suddenly joining the conversation like she’d been there the whole time. It was something she was good at, somehow. Pearl just listened to the three of them talk about homeworld, not wanting to contribute, and she placed the pancakes onto plates.

Pearl carefully slid them in front of them, listening to when Amethyst confess, “I’m not even supposed to be like this, and I never really saw homeworld.” Rose had nodded, replying, “I wasn’t happy with my job there, and I rebelled…I disagreed with how Homeworld functioned and..now I’m here.” Garnet had nodded, commenting about their fusion being wrong and it being so much better on Earth. And oh, how could they forget the Bismuth who made weapons instead of buildings for the diamonds? Alas, nobody was ready to discuss that…At least Bismuth’d come back soon. Pearl sighed, sitting down on her own stool and glancing out the window at the rain starting, then staring at the table.

_‘I know I said it’d be a week…but that was four days ago, and now…well, I could disappear any second…’_ Pearl thought, casually talking with the other gems. She didn’t really care about whatever they were saying, until they brought up the child on its way. She listened carefully, hearing someone say, “When’s the child supposed to arrive?” and someone else go, “It’ll be here any day.” The three of them were clearly excited for the new member in the group, but still sad she’d be leaving. The once sliver in her gem was now deeper then ever, giving her a dull ache in her head but she didn’t mind. It had been there for a while, but it was getting worse. Rose, Garnet, and Amethyst got up at almost the exact same time and sat down on the couch.

Pearl went over and sat on the armrest, crossing her legs and glancing around. The ache coming from her gem continually increased, and she tried to ignore it. Amethyst had ended up turning on the TV, the four of them watching some movie about an apprentice following a cold-hearted man, who soon warmed up to them. Nobody had ever really been an apprentice, so they didn’t complain about that, however Pearl was muttering something about the sword techniques being off. They watched the movie, ending up eating a quick lunch and watching another movie. Today was just a casual day for the gems, nothing much to do with the rain pattering on the window outside.

Somehow, they managed to all watch movies the entire day, only noticing when it was dark outside. Pearl didn’t really mind, getting up from the couch and grabbing a glass of water, sitting down on her usual stool. She was annoyed because the headache had gotten worse all of the sudden, and she tried to ignore it. With a child, she couldn’t take her anti-anxiety medication, so she was always jumpy, but that’s beside the point. The main point was she couldn’t take Advil or some other painkillers to take away the pain, not like she’d do it to begin with.

“Are you okay, Pearl?” Rose had asked, seeing her sitting on the stool for a while and massaging her head. “Hm? Yeah, I’m fine. Just a little headache,” Pearl said afterwards, a reassuring smile on her face. Rose nodded, and continued watching the movie, but still did check on her every now and again. At some point she stopped looking, assuming it was alright. Amethyst never really checked, but Garnet strangely continued watching Pearl. It was confusing, and at some point Garnet got up and sat next to her in the empty seat. Pearl sighed, staring at the water shaking in the cup, her hand trembling and making it move. The pain was almost unbearable, and she put her other hand over her gem.

_‘I wonder if this means the child is coming….’_ Pearl thought, smiling sadly and still in tremendous pain. She accepted this fact and suddenly there was a bright light, the Rose Quartz gem glowing as well as her own. There was a large blob for a few seconds, shaping and forming the little child. Rose and Amethyst saw the light and both jumped up, standing in awe watching. The little child appeared, now going to be called Steven, and the Rose Quartz gem was there bright as day. Beside it on the stool was Pearl’s gem, resting on it. Garnet caught the child before they fell on the ground, and everyone took a minute to process what happened. Rose cried, both very happy and sad at the same time, then looked at the infant. They didn’t look like Pearl at all, which would help with grieving, but it would still be painful…

 


	6. Learning To Cope

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smallest chapter in the world here  
> don't expect anything soon, enjoy ig

…over the next few weeks, nobody cleaned up the glass of water Pearl had been holding in her hands. It remained there, a painful reminder of who was there no longer. Amethyst hadn’t said a word, walking around the house in a silence. Garnet had been silent too, but everyone on the team was taking care of the child. Rose cried many times over the first two-three weeks, but also took care of the child with a newly-found happiness. They had decided to call him Steven, which really did seem to suit him. At some point Rose had tried to heal Pearl’s gem, which was still sitting there on the counter, but to no avail. She wasn’t going to come back, and this definitely confirmed it.

“Hello Steeeven,” Rose said with a laugh, holding out her hand and shaking it in front of him. He smiled, waving his hand as well. Steven clearly didn’t understand the drastic loss…

Garnet came in with a sigh, opening the door to her room in order to escape it, and she came over to the little child. “Seems to be developing fine.”

Rose nodded. “Good thing. Have you seen Amethyst?” Garnet shook her head, a frown on her face.

“No, no I haven’t.”

As if on cue, and easing their worries, Amethyst came out of her room and sat down on the couch. The three of them talked, really talked. Like how they really felt about everything, and how they were really doing. Everyone agreed on bringing back Bismuth within the next few weeks, and they all felt upset that their team was breaking apart over the loss. Now they just had to raise a child, how hard could that be..?

 


	7. Time Really Flies

Months went by, and everyone seemed to get over the empty space in the temple. Of course, that’s not to say they were over everything, it’s just that they learned how to tone it down. Grieving slowed, and while there would forever be the empty space there in their hearts…it was manageable now. Steven grew to be a kind and loving boy, but yet often wondered if he could be enough for the loss. Was he helping them cope? He was, however he didn’t know that, as he never bothered to ask. Steven’s birthday was coming up this week, and he would be turning thirteen. As their gift, the gems said they were giving him something better then any object in the stores. What could that be?

“Do you have the cake?” Garnet asked, looking at Rose. Rose nodded, revealing up a cookie-cat ice cream cake to her, and she stuck the candles right in the middle of the eyes saying _13._ Amethyst was working on the decorations, and it was space themed. There were star banners all across the walls, which were slanted but alright. Strings of planets were also there with the stars, also slanted. She had turned around on the ladder to look at the cake. “Looks pretty good,” Amethyst had said afterwards, turning back around to face the wall and placing balloons around the ceiling that resembled planets. The party would be at night, as it took a while to set it up, and you could see the real stars at night.

Rose went outside, setting up the activities. Granted it was an outer-space themed party, they were going to look for constellations in the sky, but they also did classic things like unwrapping gifts and eating cake. She set out, putting a goodie bag at each spot at the tables set up, which had a constellation pin in it and a plush of a star, smiling, as well as a cookie cat ice cream sandwich. Rose admired the scene, noting it was almost time for the party to commence. Steven had been hanging out with Connie all day, and the two of them were to arrive any second. Rose looked down the town, seeing the two of them casually walking towards the party in the distance. She ran back inside and said to Garnet and Amethyst, “He’s coming! Come on we gotta get outside!”

Garnet nodded and walked outside, Amethyst leaping off of the ladder and running out behind her with Rose on her tail. The three of them sat down, where people from Beach City were already sitting in their seats at the table. A few moments later Steven and Connie arrived, sitting at their seats next to each other and across from Lars and Sadie. They happily chatted, Rose taking the lead and demonstrating in front of the long, rectangular table how to cut up the papers to form a star which they could color with markers in three bins, one on each side and one in the middle. _Pearl would’ve loved to demonstrate this, wouldn’t she?_ Garnet watched with amusement, keeping everything in check, while Amethyst did the craft as well for something to do. The craft went well, then everyone danced around the beach-they’d look at the constellations in the sky later. Steven and Connie danced together, Connie being embarrassed at first but later warming up to the idea, Lars had leaned against the house with a cup of water in his hands, Sadie had danced..most everyone danced, really.

Everyone watched-some with amusement and some without-Steven open his gifts. He knew that the big one would be later, when everyone left, and it made him really enjoy the entire party even more. Somehow.

After that they searched for the constellations, reminded again of Pearl’s absence, and finding a few. It was hard to find them, a real struggle for some people, but nevertheless they managed. After a while of looking at the stars, the cake was brought out and everyone sang _happy birthday_ to Steven, who was having the time of his life. He couldn’t shake the feeling that someone was missing, but still loved the party. Everyone ate the cake, talking and enjoying themselves, until people had started to leave. Lars was the first to go home, the adults without children-like Mr.Smiley-and Mayor Dewey-as he hadn’t a reason to stay-following suit. Connie was the last to leave, taking the one remaining goodie bag in hand and, with a smile, she headed home. Steven blushed, then looked around the now abandoned party supplies.

Garnet and Amethyst were already cleaning up, Rose smiling and coming over to Steven. The two of them played catch while Garnet cleaned up, as Amethyst had left at some point to go inside and get the last gift. Garnet went over to Steven, the three of them moving to the couch inside while Amethyst explained to Bismuth everything in the temple. Well, almost everything…They came out of her room, and Bismuth smiled to Steven. He looked genuinely surprised, sitting there in a stupor, while Rose and Garnet came over and pulled her into a big hug. Bismuth smiled, then it turned to a frown. “Where’s Pearl?” she had asked, confused on where she was and what Steven was reacting to. Of course she was told about Steven being formed, but not about…the consequences of it…She looked more puzzled when she saw Rose, then it pieced together. “She didn’t…”

Bismuth looked to them for conformation, a grim look on everyone’s face with the exception of Steven, and nodded. “Makes sense for her to do it. But damn, why didn’t you stop her? She was supposed to…” she shook it off and smiled again, the five of them chatting with a light tone. Maybe everything would be alright now. Maybe.


	8. Everything's Better Now, Is It Always That Way..?

. . .

Steven thought now and again about Pearl. It had been a few more months by now, and Bismuth was once again considered a Crystal Gem, but…Shouldn’t it all be happy in his life? Now there was a new addition to the team, and yet…it still felt like something was missing. The water glass still lay on the counter, and the house was a mess. Nobody taught Steven to clean up, so his toys littered the floor and his bed was a blanket in a messy ball with a pillow somewhere on it. In the middle of the night one day, he got up and grabbed Pearl’s gem, heading outside and resting on the soft sand, watching the waves crash along the shore. He cried onto the gem, hoping deep in his heart it would’ve…but nothing, and he remembered his healing spit. He placed it on the gem, and still nothing. Or so he thought. The gem healed on the inside, where there was a deep crack invisible by glancing at it…Why couldn’t Pearl just be here? It was obviously hard on everyone! Couldn’t she just be here with them?! Angry tears spilled onto the once-warm sand, and he tossed the gem without thinking into the ocean. Panic hit him once he realized what he just did, but he couldn’t wake the other gems…He sighed, getting up and going back to bed.

. . .

Pearl woke up to find she was drowning. She guessed that because of all the time gems used breathing it was easy to forget you didn’t need to. She had reformed some time later in the night, swimming up to the surface with a frown. _‘I’m not supposed to be here…where am I? Am I…alive again?’_ she wondered, looking around the water and not finding anything. Pearl was glad when she saw the beach somewhere, then wondered why she was in the middle of the ocean anyways. She was soaked, but the water was a pleasant temperature. The ocean was a blue, which was an unusual color for the ocean, and there were various aquatic plants at the bottom, not to mention animals like dolphins. She swam to the shore, coughing up some water, and she looked at the beach. It was night, and she couldn’t really see much. It was empty, but the home she used to know so well was still there. She felt like just the other day she was dying, the memory still there in her head. However she had seen the present through her gem, which she didn’t think possible until it happened…Pearl got up from the sand-tripping once or twice, then getting the hang of it-and entered the house, making a slight _creak_ when she entered. Pearl glanced up to see Steven sleeping peacefully, and looked around. Geez, it was like nobody really cared about filth in the house. Disgusted, she started to clean up the house. It seemed that everyone else had gone to their rooms in the temple, which did make sense. She noticed a glass of water sitting out on the counter, then remembered that it was there the entire time she was in her gem. That…was weird. Perhaps it was the water she drank before she left? Ugh, so nobody cleaned at **all** when she was gone?! Gross. She frowned, picking up shirts of the sleeping boy in his bed above her. Pearl recalled Rose saying she would call him Steven if the infant was a boy, and Nora if a girl. ‘ _So it’s Steven, huh? Wonder if he’d care to meet me now that I’m here…Ugh, this is gonna be so hard…’_ Pearl glanced at the boy named Steven, then looked outside. It was around, say, 1:05 A.M.? Of course she did have much practice when she was what she’d call ‘dead’, even though technically she was just resting, unable to escape, of telling the time. Pearl loaded the dishwasher-after cleaning the dishes of course, that’s what they were for right? Double checking?-with the pots and pans of months of work and food, then she looked at the laundry, putting it in the washer. Honestly, she was amazed the kid even had one clean shirt left, what with all the ones scattered about the ground and all of them she had to put in the washer. Pearl stood, looking around and deciding to scrub everything down once she came back inside, taking the trash out of all the bins and heading out.

. . .

Steven woke up with a soft gasp, as he heard a loud noise and thought it was the warp. He had assumed, at first, it was one of the gems coming home from a mission. But he was wrong, looking around and noticing…were the washer and the dishwasher actually running? _‘It’s a ghost! I need to get out of here!!’_ he thought, panicking and falling off of his bed. Steven heard the door shut, seeing some slim figure walk outside… _‘Was it a burglar?!_ He looked around the house, not seeing anything missing except… _‘the dishes and his shirts!!! That thief must’ve put the dishwasher on to make him **assume** nothing was missing! Wasn’t gonna work for this man!’_ He got up, forming a shield-as Bismuth had taught him to do when she arrived and got settled-and he raced to the door. The mysterious figure was walking off towards the trashcans. _‘probably to leave!’_ Steven thought, opening the door forcefully and looking at them, without much luck as they were covered in darkness from it being 1:20 A.M. by now. Steven raced over and grabbed their shoulders, pulling the figure to the ground. He was going to beat them or something then he noticed a gem on their forehead…was this…“…Pearl?!” Pearl looked at him with fear, before having shut her eyes forcefully. Now though she was looking at him in a scared way, and he immediately felt guilty. The poor gem probably didn’t understand where she was, what time it was, what had gone on for the past…what, 14 to 15 years? Aw geez, she probably didn’t even know who he was! She shook, trembling, and she tried to get off of him. He focused back on the situation, remembering it, and he got off of her, helping her up. She frowned, covered in dirt and sand and shaking it off of herself with her hands. Pearl looked at him, appearing very tired and looking paler then her normal self, not like Steven’d know though.

. . .

“H-hello..Steven, w…was it?” she managed, the words being hard to form from only thinking for…however long it was. He had looked at her, smiling and nodding.

“Yep. Name’s Steven! Why don’t we go back inside-you were cleaning, weren’t you?” Pearl nodded, walking behind him up into the house and grabbing some cleaning products.

He didn’t really know what to do, as he never cleaned before, and so he sat down on his messy bed, watching her scrub the counters and the cabinets. She moved on to the couch, straightening it until it was perfect and moving all the blankets away, folding them and placing them on the ground beside Steven’s bed.

He had gotten off and moved over to the other side of the house, watching her pick up the blankets and make his bed. When she finished cleaning the entire house and everything looked neat and tidy, she pulled out a pan from memory and started on a breakfast like she had so many times before. Steven was confused, not understanding why she had suddenly made breakfast. He looked outside, to his shock realizing it was slightly after dawn, and she was making breakfast for the whole crew. “Bismuth’s back,” he said, watching her add more food to suit five of them…

_‘I guess she used to be the one to make breakfast if she was the only one up..? And why doesn’t she eat…?’_ he thought, seeing her only take out breakfast for five of the six members…less she wasn’t a part of the team? Hmm. He watched her cook, sitting on his stool with his legs spread, his hands in between and his legs kicking and he smiled. She finished with the pancakes, placing a plate in front of Steven and one for each seat, as the empty stool was taken away long ago before Rose left, should’ve left anyways, because it wasn’t needed when Bismuth left and Rose decided around a day before Pearl left to take the stool to the dump. Pearl was standing there, pouring water into each glass when Bismuth came out, walking over and taking a seat without looking up. She noticed there was food and she knew for a fact that, judging by the positioning of each food and her knowledge of Rose being away and both Garnet and Amethyst asleep, it wasn’t one of them. Bismuth had a bite on her fork before realizing what was going on. She looked next to her, seeing Steven, then looked up.

Pearl smiled sheepishly, waving and saying a little “Hello”, to which Bismuth opened her mouth wider, the fork clattering to the plate. Tears of joy rolled down her face and she ran around the counter, giving her a big bear hug, Steven getting up and joining. Her face grew to a smile. Pearl flinched, then stood, shocked, for a moment before bringing up her arms and hugging the two of them. They stayed like that for a while, the three of them, until Bismuth let go and Steven and herself both started eating. Before they could manage to take two bites, however, Amethyst had came out of her door holding a stack of dirty plates. She looked around the room and almost instantly noticed Pearl standing there, who was facing the sink and working on cleaning the kitchen utensils she used for the pancakes. The dirty dishes fell to the floor, crashing and shattering to pieces. Amethyst quickly recovered, leaping over the table and falling on top of Pearl with a smile on her face. Pearl had flinched upon initial contact and when the plates fell as well, but she smiled and hugged her friend-no, family-back. The two of them remained like that for a while, ‘till Amethyst got up and started eating beside Bismuth.

 

. . .

Garnet woke up with a sigh that morning. It seemed everyone was finally over the loss of Pearl, but she still felt a pang in her heart when she was talked about. She got up and moved towards the door, hearing a strange cry…of joy, perhaps? Garnet frowned, then put on her best neutral face and went out of her door. She could smell the pancakes that Pearl used to make and then she saw her. Garnet smiled, going and sitting down with a tear rolling down her face. “I thought I’d never see you again.” The two of them hugged just like everyone else, yes, and then all who was left was Rose to show up.

. . .

Pearl stood around awkwardly, waiting for Rose to show up so they could all figure out what to do. Rose did show up, covering her mouth and crying with joy like everyone else on the team; she ran over for a hug, then everyone sat down and talked about what to do. Things would be alright now. They would, sure, go through a lot in their upcoming lives, but who doesn’t? They’ll all get along and fight, but they’ll figure out everything together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yesss I know I wasn't here for a while and YESSS I know Lapis and Peridot aren't here but...eh so much work. DON'T GET ME WRONG they're like my second favorite characters, but I don't feel like adding them to this and besides, this is like...a fanfic, meaning not everything is the same. Yeah good to see y'all, might never post again but I might! Enjoy your lives ^^'


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